Iraq Quiz


IRAQ QUIZ – 10 Questions

This examination will test your knowledge of the most recent issues surrounding the war.  Each question is worth 0 points.  No matter how well you do, we all lose.  Good luck!   

 

1.  With the “handover of power,” how much has the violence declined?

A.  Completely!  Iraq is liberated from Saddam; Democracy has been instilled; the occupation is over, and sovereignty is returned to the people of Iraq.  

B.  There is some violence, but it is the fun-to-watch kickass Chuck Norris kind!

C.  Not too much.  C’mon, we’re talking about ARABS here…

D.  38 American soldiers were killed in August, 12 more than in June.  “The uprising by Muqtada al-Sadr’s militants – and the since-abandoned Marine effort to pacify Fallujah – ushered in the worst violence since the U.S. and its allies invaded Iraq last year.”  Fallujah is now a safe haven for terrorists and insurgents.  Roadside bombs, car bombs, and insurgent attacks show no sign of waning; Americans are killed almost everyday (Philadelphia Inquirer).  U.S. military reports state that a huge amount of the violence occurring in Iraq is not revealed to journalists.  The accounts of the insurgency (al-Sadr’s) “provide astonishing proof” that, since the handover of power, Iraq “has grown more dangerous and violent (The Independent).   

 

2.  Now that Iyad Allawi is Prime Minister of Iraq, does he have things more or less under control?

A.  Absolutely!  No one fucks with a guy who learned his brutality from the CIA

B.  Definitely, this guy has taken rag-tag, undisciplined groups before, made a few changes, and turned them into champions.  He’s been on hiatus, but now that he’s back, you can bet he’ll do it again.  Wait, sorry, that’s Bill Parcells. 

C.  Of course he does, it’s not like America would ever just prop up a shady puppet regime for its own political advantage.

D.  "In the capital of the largest province of Iraq's so-called 'Sunni triangle', rebels have taken to announcing their daily arrival by loud-speaker. 'Close your shops before 14:00. We don't want to hit anyone. The fighting will begin after 14:00…” By 13:45, everyone is gone from the streets, including the police and the Iraqi National Guard (British Financial Times).  Allawi is little more than a puppet ruler who presides over the small Green Zone of Baghdad; most of Iraq is in turmoil with few signs of improvement.  Allawi is described as being equally mistrusted by all factions within Iraq.  According to several witnesses, Allawi “pulled a pistol and executed as many as six suspected insurgents at a Baghdad police station, just days before Washington handed control of the country to his interim government” (Sydney Morning Herald).  Meet the new boss…  

 

3.  Under Saddam, many prison abuses were recorded.  Do these still occur?

A.  Nope.  The Good Guys are in charge now, remember?

B.  Abu Ghraib.

C.  Abu Ghraib!

D.  According to an investigation by the Glasgow Morning Herald, the number of     children imprisoned by coalition forces can be as many as 107.  Investigator Neil Mackay writes: “"A detention centre for children was established in Baghdad, where according to ICRC (International Committee of the Red Cross) a significant number of children were detained. UNICEF was informed that the coalition forces were planning to transfer all children in adult facilities to this 'specialized' child detention centre. In July 2003, UNICEF requested a visit to the centre but access was denied. Poor security in the area of the detention centre has prevented visits by independent observers like the ICRC since last December."  Many think that these reports and what we know about Abu Ghraib are just the tip of the iceberg. Seymour Hersh of the New Yorker is “on the trail of the story of the rape and sodomizing of young, imprisoned Iraqis, possibly by Americans, or at least viewed by and filmed by Americans, in Abu Ghraib” (Tom Engelhardt of TomDispatch).

 

4.  Is America doing a good job of rebuilding Iraq and then handing control over to the Iraqi people?

A.  Yes!  Multinational corporations are spearheading democracy in Iraq while keeping decision making and natural resources in the hands of Iraqis.

B.  With hammers, nails, some patience, globs of love, and a helluva lotta spunk, we’ll get that scrappy nation back on its feet in a jiffy!

C.   A McDonalds on every corner and an Iraqi behind every drive-thru window.  Wait, are cows sacred and shit to Arabs?  Lemme look that up…

D.  American companies are receiving billion dollar contracts, but most Iraqis still have no electricity.  Even with the decade of crippling sanctions against Iraq, prewar electricity levels were higher than they are right now (Washington Post).  With the transition of power, Bush, Rumsfeld, Bremer, et al, are creating institutions that will “give the U.S. powerful levers for influencing nearly every important decision the interim government will make.”  Powers once wielded by several ministries are now under the auspices of Bremer’s Coalition Provisional Authority.  “The CPA also ... put in place a pair of watchdog institutions that will serve as checks on individual ministries and allow for continued U.S. oversight. Meanwhile, the CPA reiterated that coalition advisers will remain in virtually all remaining ministries after the handover...” (Wall Street Journal).  That sovereignty in Iraq belongs to anyone but Bush, Halliburton and neocon imperialists is deception.       

 

5.  How many Iraqi civilians have died because of the war?

A.  The collateral damage has been minimal and the benefits of ousting a ruthless dictator far outweigh the mounting number of civilian graves.

B.  13,458 (maximum number given by Iraq Body Count)

C.  37,000 (number cited by an Iraqi political group, according to Al Jazeera)

D.  It is difficult to say due to the lies and cover-ups.  When the Ministry of Health began counting civilian causalities, they were ordered to stop by the Iraqi Governing Council and U.S. occupation authorities (Associated Press).  It is even more difficult to factor in the staggering number who have died and will die due to lack of electricity, clean water, medical supplies, and a destroyed infrastructure.       

 

6.  Are the media covering what is occurring in Iraq right now?

A.  The media is doing an exemplary job of giving me Fair and Balanced reporting!  They are reporting, while I am deciding!  I want Roger Ailes inside me!

B.  Shouldn’t it be “is the media”? 

C.  I’ll get to that when I’m done reading all these retrospectives on Reagan.

D.  Despite the increased violence after the handover of power, the media portrayed the situation in a positive, dishonest light.  Michael Schwartz (Zmag.org) points out that “Scott Wilson of the Washington Post referred to this period as "relative calm," while Jeffrey Gettleman of the New York Times labeled it "relatively quiet."  It’s a good thing we aren’t subjected to the biased nationalism found in terrorist-supporting news sources like Al Jazeera.

 

7.  Please give one example of Bush attempting to urinate all over the Constitution.

A.  This is one of those loaded questions, I think.

B.  Just ONE example?  Jesus that’s tough…

C.  Does double stream action from Bush and Ashcroft count?

D.  The War on Terror should be over shortly, so let’s just hold off on that whole election thing until we have it all worked out.  Counterterrosim officials, alarmed by possible Al Qaeda strikes in the fall, “are reviewing a proposal that could allow for the postponement of the Novemeber Presidential election.”  The Department of Homeland Security sent an inquiry to the Justice Department’s Office of Legal Counsel to analyze the legal issues around such a postponement (Newsweek).  Huh…Al Qaeda strikes, election is held off, Bush stays in power, Bush further infuriates and polarizes the world, recruitment for Al Qaeda and other terrorist organizations shoot up, Bin Laden et al become more powerful and dangerous.  We’re all so much safer now that Saddam is out, right?  When the Bush/Bin Laden ’05 stickers come out, then we know we’re in trouble.         

 

8.  Is the War on Terror and our national security affected by personal political motives?

A.  Of course not.  I think you’re trying to go somewhere with this question…

B.  Yes.  But I’m pretty sure Hillary is the one behind it. 

C.  Whatever happened to that whole anthrax thing?  I haven’t heard Caught in a Mosh forever.

D.  In Pakistan, security officials were ordered to produce HVTs (high-valued targets) by the election.  A source in Pakistan’s Inter-Services Intelligence even said, “The Pakistani government is really desperate and wants to flush out bin Laden and his associates after the latest pressures from the U.S. administration to deliver before the [upcoming] U.S. elections."  Another source working directly under Pakistan’s Lieutenant General said that Pakistanis “have been told at every level that apprehension or killing of HVTs before [the] election is [an] absolute must."  It gets worse.  A White House aide told the ISI officals last spring that “it would be best if the arrest or killing of [any] HVT were announced on twenty-six, twenty-seven, or twenty-eight July" (The New Republic).  Yup – during the Democratic National Convention.

 

9.  Why did we invade Iraq?

A.  That question is just ridiculous.  Iraq posed a substantial threat to America because of the weapons of mass destruction that they either possessed or were in the process of developing.

B.  Direct links to Al Qaeda.

C.  Because you don’t fuck with mah Daddy.

D.  According to Paul Wolfowitz in an interview in Vanity Fair, “For bureaucratic reasons, we settled on one issue, weapons of mass destruction, because it was the one reason everyone could agree on."  After running that gem through the Neocon Bullshit Translator, we get:  “It was the easiest story to tell the American people to deceive them into supporting our war.”  It wasn’t just that WMD weren’t found, it is that the Bush Administration and the CIA fabricated the entire premise.  The report issued by the Senate Intelligence Committee said that “The United States went to war with Iraq on the basis of flawed intelligence assessments that 'either overstated or were not supported by' the underlying evidence on Baghdad's weapons programs…” (Los Angeles Times).  There was probably a lot more damning information in the report, but we’ll never know because the CIA censored out an estimated 20% of it (New York Times). 

         

10.  Who will be next to be targeted and attacked by the USA?

A.  Iran

B.  Syria

C.  North Korea

D.  The American people

 "Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we."
- Geroge W. Bush, August 5, 2004 to Joint Chiefs and members of Cabinet

© 2004 Aaron Sussman. All rights reserved.

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